Ahh. It feels nice to be back. Sort of. ;)
1. LOVE vs. FEAR. Each moment, each challenge, each person is an opportunity to discover more about ourselves and the world around us.
2. ACCEPTANCE vs. RESISTANCE. Accept what has happened instead of resisting the situation. Ask yourself: What can I learn from this? How can I make this better?Focus on the positive rather than on the negative.
3. FORGIVENESS vs. UNFORGIVENESS. It’s not healthy to hold on to anger. Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” Buddha
4. TRUST vs. DOUBT. Beliefs become self-fulfilling prophecies, and because of this, we need to make sure to treat everybody with love, dignity and respect. These are the great men that Mark Twain was talking about: “Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”Mark Twain
5. MEANING vs. AMBITION. Understand that “Doing what you love is the cornerstone of having abundance in your life” like Wayne Dyer puts it, and care more about living a life full of meaning rather than, what in our modern society we would call, living a successful life.
6. PRAISING vs. CRITICIZING. Don’t criticize the absence of the behavior you want to reinforce, but rather, every time the behavior is present, even if it’s not that often, know that by praising the person and the behavior, they will actually reinforce the positive behavior.
When a parent wants to make sure that his 7 years old boy will learn to always put the toys back in the box after he’s done playing with them, he will make sure not to focus on the many times the child won’t do it, criticizing him and his behavior, but rather, every time the little boy does put the toys back, the parent will praise him and his behavior and that is exactly how he will reinforce the positive behavior, and in the end getting the wanted results.
7. CHALLENGES vs. PROBLEMS. See PROBLEMS as CHALLENGES, as opportunities to explore new ways of doing things, expressing gratitude for them, and understanding this will make us grow.
8. SELFLESSNESS vs. SELFISHNESS. Do what you do not for yourself, but for the good of others, making sure that you bring meaning, empowerment and happiness in the lives of many.
9. ABUNDANCE vs. LACK/POVERTY. They have an abundant mindset living a balanced life.
10. DREAMING BIG vs. BEING REALISTIC. Love and dare to dream big; always listen to your heart and intuition.
11. KINDNESS vs. CRUELTY. Be kind to yourself and others; understand the power of self love, self forgiveness and self acceptance.
12. GRATITUDE vs. INGRATITUDE. Express gratitude for the simple gifts life bestows upon us instead of complaining about all that we don’t have.
13. PRESENCE/ ENGAGEMENT vs. DISENGAGEMENT. Live in the present moment, appreciating what you have and where you are, while still having big dreams about the future.
14. POSITIVITY vs. NEGATIVITY. Self-explanatory.
15. TAKING RESPONSIBILITY vs. BLAMING. Take full ownership over your lives and rarely use excuses. The moment you choose to blame outside forces, you are in fact giving all your power away.
My Review of The Grand Del Mar.
I almost forgot about this article I wrote last year for Audrey Magazine (Fall 2012)! Because I reviewed their hotel, The Grand Del Mar reserved one of their $1K/night suites for me to enjoy! Plus, they added champagne, fruits, and nuts as a service because it was my birthday weekend! :) Thank you Grand Del Mar and Audrey Magazine for providing me with a wonderful experience I won’t ever forget.
I will post a few of my other published articles when time allows.
Pretty awesome set up.
A HISTORY LESSON, VERY INTERESTING! READ IT ALL..
They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery…….if you had to do this to survive you were “Piss Poor”
But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn’t even afford to buy a pot……they “didn’t have a pot to
piss in” & were the lowest of the low
The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:
Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June.. However, since they were starting to smell… Brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odour. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting Married.
Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the
children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it.. Hence the saying, “Don’t throw the baby out with the Bath water!”
Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs)
lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof… Hence the saying “It’s raining cats and dogs.”
There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how canopy beds came into existence.
The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, “Dirt poor.” The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet,
so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping
outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: a thresh hold.
In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire.. Every day they lit
the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old. Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When
visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, “bring home the bacon.” They would cut off a little to share with guests
and would all sit around and chew the fat.
Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.
Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt
bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.
Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would Sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.
England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they
realized they had been burying people alive… So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone
could be, saved by the bell or was considered a dead ringer.
And that’s the truth….Now, whoever said History was boring was crazy.
Once I was lost. I was so afraid. My blood pounded in my chest and I knew my heart’s strength would soon be exhausted. I saved myself without thinking. I grasped the two syllables closest to me and replaced my heartbeat with your name.
Sometimes your nearness takes my breathe away; all the things I want to say find no voice.
Then, in silence, I only hope
that my eyes will speak my heart.
Have you watched Cinderella Man? If you have not, you should. It isn’t just a movie about boxing, a visceral portrayal of the Great Depression, or a man’s triumph over mitigating circumstances; it has to be one of the greatest love stories to ever grace the big screen.
* * * * *
Oftentimes, relationships can resemble fast food: they’re cheap yet filling; they give immediate satisfaction but have long-term side effects; they’re bad for you but you choose it anyway; convenience overrides any desire to go the distance to find something more worthwhile.
So in a fast-moving world with a fast-paced lifestyle where here and now is much preferred to later, how do we know if Love is really Love? If it’s just as easy to get out of as it is to get into it, how will we know if we’ve really found this seemingly elusive concept called Love?
And then there are those individuals who desperately want to find Love, and will will themselves to believe they have found it, only to realize later it wasn’t really what they’d thought it was. What about those individuals who, after a night of deceit and misappropriated lust, go back to their significant others as if nothing had happened?
Over the years, it seems to me that saying I love you has lost it’s meaning in so many ways: some utter these words only to find that once the relationship is over, they no longer feel this way. What they’d believed was once true and heartfelt isn’t any longer, and they justify the change of heart with a laundry list of reasons why the relationship couldn’t work out. Playing the blame game seems to be so much more convenient than admitting to themselves that maybe love, in this relationship, wasn’t what they had thought it could be. That maybe they had made the wrong decision of picking someone who wasn’t worthy of their heart and time. That maybe the consumption of “fast love” had left them feeling shameful and guilty. It’s always easier to blame the cause than the enabler, after all.
Cheating, divorce, desperation, petty break-ups, and lies cheapen that which is absolutely invaluable in my book: pure, unadulterated, can’t-live-without-you type of love. Nowadays, it seems so many are willing to exchange vows, only to rescind their promises once the storm hits. Instead of fighting to keep their relationship afloat, instead of withstanding the torrent and weathering the conditions, it seems more appealing to look for sunny days elsewhere.
Love doesn’t have a 7-day forecast. It doesn’t warn you so you can make your quiet escape to the tropical islands nor is it accommodating enough to provide an umbrella for the rain. It’s not about having to weather through these conditions; it’s really about how you handle this situation and how you’ll deal with the possibility that you may come out of it just a little damaged. How will you prepare yourself for next time?
Love isn’t always convenient or easy; Love can be angry, passionate, heated, and it can very well step on toes. It can affirm you or leave you feeling defeated, but that’s what’s so appealing about it: it stirs our emotional gears and makes us feel ALIVE.
Unlike fast food, love should be that divine 9-course meal at that five-star restaurant everyone raves about: every course starting from the appetizer would tantalize us to savor each bite and anticipate what is to come next. Love, much like each course, should get better with time — not make us feel shameful and guilty for having experienced it.
* * * * *
The two main characters of this movie, James and Mae Braddock, exemplify what I believe is true love.
Mae represents the kind of woman I hope to be for my partner. Through thick and thin, through sickness and in health, for better and for worse - she is her husband’s guiding light. She is the torch that’s always kept aflame should he flounder in the darkness. She is the motivating force behind his ideals, ideals which are realized through her unconditional love and faith in him. She meets his defeated ego with a hug each and every time, and carries through on her vows and promises to stay and persevere no matter how hard things may get.
Regardless of circumstance or outcome, he will always remain a champion who has won her heart, and in the end, all worldly desires melt away and blur into insignificance for nothing moves her core the way her love for him does. And no other way of loving him would be good enough for him.
A self-respecting woman will provide this kind of love for her man, and will give this valuable gift to the right kind of man. And it is this kind of woman who will be more than worthy enough to land a champion who will fight to keep her heart.